The eight

I'm pretty much overwhelmed of what semester 8 has to offer me now. it seems that I could stumble at any time if I weren't strong enough. which I'm pretty much aware that I'm not THAT strong but here now, looking back 5 years from the back got me thinking that how much stronger that I've became. but now, I start to feel shaky again. my heart literally pounding for the never-ending works.Completing the research reports, CS round table discussion, AR presentation to supervisor, I got two seminars which is of course the most vital one, The VIVA, the other one is EDU seminar. Later, is the SPP interview.sometimes I felt like these are too much to take in. and sometimes when there's one that shot me down, God I feel helpless. I mean, what do I do? I have come this far but I don't want to stumble now. It's difficult for me to stand up really hard sit in a position where everything is going to be okay. 

now my life is getting more interesting and a lot more amaaazing you know,

I'm in the verge tearing myself apart, breaking down but at the same trying so hard to pick myself and said 'don't fall.' sometimes I cried thinking that I'm strong enough and how am I going to get through this? this semester is like everything to me now. this semester is not like any of past semesters. I don't waste it. I wanna take it all. 
all in a sense which involve everything my feelings, my works, my friends, and even a friendly guard, pak cik Omar who always makes all of us smile everyday. this week I never stop going to the library. I saw the same faces went to the library everyday. The research is like a never-ending episode of nightmares. everyone feels the same effect and we can't sit still anymore. each one of us are assigned with more than one works now. This time around, I need to a handle as MC for seminar and a chairperson for VIVA. same also with the rests, all of us have the works. no more standing there like a puppet waiting for a person to hold your stringer.

I'm multitasking like crazy right now. I mean all of us are multitasking like crazy from now on. preparing for the seminars and at the same time doing the assignments given. it's almost sounds impossible to achieve but effort comes with a surprise you know. you'll never know how far you would go or how far that you could walk. really, I can't fall now. I'll do whatever I can to finish this climb. since the first year I entered in IPG, I promised to myself that I would end this study with a bliss and I wanna do that for real no matter what happen. I don't care how much a single drop of frustration would drag me down. I'll come right back up even more stronger. 

the excitement is there to be honest. the excitement exists because I wanna embrace all of the moments as I could get. I wanna enjoy these last remaining life as student before graduate cause after that, I will be facing life for real. frankly, I'm not ready yet. to be a pretty much what you call a matured adult. an adult with a job. cause that sounds still so heavy. those responsibilities are going to pour at you like bullets.

but you wanna know how I feel right now? I feel amazing. 

Life has been amazing. 


-to be continued 

p/s: Am, get well soon.