its over, december

it's over, finally..

it's over..

I decided to put stop on our relationship. it's all lies. everything is a lie. about how he wanted to be sure. How he had planned for me. he didn't. and there I was. lying on the floor. trying to pull my shit together. trying to hypnotize myself that I don't need a bastard like that. I don't need his sweet talks. everything has based on lies. I'm glad that I put stop on this before it went on and on and on and on. in the end, it was me who's suffering. not him. but it has been tough. I'm not gonna lie. it's hurtful. especially when all of your friends are already set the life goals but here you are again, in the heartbreaking zone. my niece is getting married while my heart has been shattered into pieces. I don't even know how to make this feel better again. I'm 25 for god's sake. how should I not be panicking? I don't know what else should I mend this. what else I can do? but there's one thing that I'm sure of. I won't run back to him anymore. don't ever come back like that again.

I'm afraid that I'll never love again.