indecisive month

I tend to be indecisive recently. Everything just need to be put on hold.

one of my friend invited me to go back with her. I told her that I'll confirm her back. I planned to go skytrex with my friends, I had to tell them about it and confirm about my plan later. whether to join or not. all those thing need a decision. a precise one, so I won't lose the better option.

I took time to think. To consider of the cause and effect. the consequence. yet I'm the one who suffers. suffer due to overthinking. I'm almost hitting depression which I hope I do not. I gotta thanks to the friendly environment at school that makes me looking forward to go for work. talking about how so many things had happened these past few weeks. but those were just another history to be told or to be recap again. but gosh, so many things happened! and it almost end of the year.

finance/savings:
-not much really. I'm still having a hard time to be discipline on this one. but I gotta give myself a pat on the shoulder at little a least cause able to keep the bonus and didn't use which helps me a lot in savings and double the finance. I tried so hard not to think of my savings and doesn't use it. I gotta thanks to myself for that. but still, it isn't in a satisfying level. I want to save more. for marriage, for travel, for study.

work:
-I work so hard this year. I bust my ass at school, trying to make everything falls into place. and try so hard to give my full responsibility, commitment. I mean, what do I have left other than my job? my job is my priority. I don't have nothing else to focus on. and maybe a little did I know, I kinda love what I'm doing right now. tho sometimes I do get annoyed with the kids.

life:
-it's been great so far. I'm a fcking introvert and I loooooove to spend my time alone, when my housemates weren't around. I could chill at the living room with singlet and legging. dance anytime. take my time reading books. do anything I please. and been on some cool places. Man I love the fresh cold water for Ledang Waterfall and I would like to go there over and over again. I took my time and money to treat myself a little. Stayed in the hotel and went to water theme park, watching fireworks and the zoo. it was amazing.

relationship:
-we had a little fought. an argument. to untangle certain things. to map out back where this is going. we're still figuring. I know it's been awhile and we took so much time in figuring out. it's awkward and complicated. to make sure that both of us understand each other. it took time for us to understand. we are trying still, we are trying. I would like to be with him and at the same time, I didn't hold on to him. I said to him that the door is always open. it's his choice whether to stay or leave. both of us have a choice. but I'm at the same time feels so glad that we've met. Honestly, I'd never find a man who would compromise to me in whatever situation. I gave him a hard time but still, he would tolerate. but I couldn't tell much yet so far. I didn't know much about him. We barely met. long distance relationship sucks but kinda makes me wonder how we have come this far.

soooo that's pretty much it. I just gotta summarize this month. to put everything in a clear view. Have a good day! :)