I got so many drafts keeping in my blog. It hasn't been arranged perfectly just like I want it to be. It ended up being kept for ages. I still had my drafts for two years ago. I tried to find a perfect time to post and again, it ended up being an old archive. so anyway, hey, how you've been doing? I haven't written a lot lately. caught up with so many agendas, routines and trips. Alhamdulillah, I managed to have my travel trip to Western Australia, Perth. In my head, I was planning to make a little notes on this but I'm just not sure when is the right time where I can just chill, sit back and relax like I always always love to do. Maybe I should give some of my views on Perth. One word : Amaaaaaazing. My next trip would Bali, Indonesia, InsyaAllah. If God's Will. I'll be able to have my second trip this year. March has been so crazzzzy. I almost ended up being a zombie like seriously! I had a terrible jet lag after the Aussie Trip. caught some fever and headache. I mean a lot, a lot of headache. Drastically changing of environment made me feel like a zombie in the walking dead. I didn't know how I'm supposed to feel anymore. Like I've lost an emotion there for a moment. I had my five days of Aussie Trip which was again, amaaaaazing. I didn't feel like going back home. you can check out my Instagram to sneak a peek of my photos in Aussie. Everything moment counts. I was afraid to close my eyes even though I was tired cause I didn't want to miss not even a bit of that trip. Right after the trip, I had to jump on the plane again to go back to my hometown for my school break. I gotta be honest. I still had a wedding aftermath. obviously not my wedding. it was my niece's wedding. Alhamdulillah everything went well. she officially off market! hahaha. But enough of me taken three pills of paracetamol to numb the headache down. The weather in Kota Bharu was viciously killing. it was scorching hot. The sun blazing like a shining blade. or maybe perhaps it's just me whose having a change of a body temperature cause the weather in Aussie is a bit chilly and cold. I didn't sweat a lot. back in hometown, I was sweating like crazy. enough to fill up a bottle of mineral water. I had a mixed up feelings when I was back in hometown. I was glad to be back. but things have changed quite a lot when you already grow up. especially when my niece same age as me is married. I was lost quite a bit there. It's like I lose a friend that I could hang the same level with. now she's at the next level and I am yet, to be like her. I don't know. A lot of emotions went on last week.
and the workplace? starting to get real fake and bitch-er than ever. I hate most of the people there now. Now I know their true skin colors make me wanna fill up the transfer form as soon as I can next year. and I'm determine. to fill it up. there's no stopping in this. Just like how I fill up the UPSI forms three times. I know. it's ridiculous. But I had my hesitation there for a moment. The timing, finance and everything. but I still wanna keep on trying. I don't have so much left for myself right now. and honestly..it has been tiring to think about a person. that one person. my future, my forever and always be, my other half. I'm just so confused. and frustrated. I'm now the oldest in the family whose still searching her life partner. Most of nieces are married. My siblings are all married. don't you see how big my stress just only there? God..it is. It's just frustrating. I just hate how people making their own mentality and concepts especially my close relatives and all. They're seeing me as I don't know. Not trying good enough maybe? wish I could run away from that narrow minded mentality. Its not like I didn't try. I did but it doesn't work out like I wanted to be. then, who am I supposed to blame? I tried. I just wanted them to know that I tried. sometimes when I was too frustrated with myself. I throw a blame on him for making me feel this way at this kinda age. It already sucks enough to face the adulthood. now I have to restart my relationship. it's tiring you know..to start over and get to know someone.
which is why most of the time, I satisfy my own space by having road trips and travels. Some people don't understand that there's a beauty in it. not because you wanted to show off or rubbing in others' faces but the experiences, priceless. I don't do it cause I wanted to show to the whole world that I made it this place and that. but the passion in it. the beauty and experience in it. Make me wanna do more. some people don't understand why you wasted so much money for that. but for people like us, it's not about money. it's the thing that can make you have an open minded thinking, to change the perspective, new knowledge that you'll gather along the way. not stuck on the same lane. I don't know about you but I couldn't stay in one place. it's more like a travelling experience as a traveler instead of being a tourist. it's different.
I had wrapped up so many topics only for this entry. I haven't blog in a while, Makes me mixed up with all sorts of jumbled up topics which I supposed to place it per entry. no, I don't think that I have much time to blog this upcoming weeks. so I guess that would be it. I did some tweets and instagram upload. that two social meds which I'm close with. It's less people there hahaha. I don't have much followers so it's easier for me to have a little space for myself instead exposing it to facebook. I feel like I'm naked if I posted some of my comments and posts. Bcause most of them judge with the foot instead of their heads. Know what I mean?
so I hope you have the best month of the year.Have a great week!
love,
Rushy
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