personal growth

i might started to blog regularly again. since i have quite a lot of things to say in mind. about most of the things. life, work and relationship. it comes in alternate way sometimes.

i have only a week. A WEEK. to recover back all the things i taught my year 6 students, to recall back all the information about what we learned before. exam papers, exam format, this and that. they're gonna be so saturated and might puke over same old revision but i don't care. let them puke all they want as long as they know what to write in the exam later. the trial is coming and all of us are not ready for it.

this weekend has started in a productive way.

friday = woke up early, sent my housemate at bus station, went out for morning jogging. then, mop my room. clean my room, laundry. then, chill. night, i went for raya celebration with teachers and staff at school.

saturday =woke up early again, pta meeting. later i went to coffee bean, bought lunch at mcd and went home. took a nap, then took my housemate at the bus station.

sometimes i dont understand why some people would say "you go out alone? why?"
"whom did you go with?"
"alone."
"ouhh..so sad. why didnt ask somebody else to accompany you?"

honestly, i dont mind. i don't have such insecurity if i went out alone. it makes me feel better even. its comfortable. i dont get it why you should be sad or insecure when the fact that you go alone by yourself just to get know yourself better. i mean, why not? you should know yourself better. going out alone is the moment where you can make decision by yourself, having inner conversation with yourself, in that way, you get to know yourself more. it is where you can embrace your time alone without anyone taking it from you. i need my time for me because most of people, they've taken a lot of my time already. back on weekdays, my time isn't really my time anymore, i have to spent it for my students, my friends, for tuition.

you know, as i get older, i realize how precious the time is. sometimes i want to reverse back all the time that i had before and spent a lot of time with myself. but i'm glad that i did. its personal growth. have you ever heard of this saying said "better spent your time alone rather than be with people who don't really care about you." get it?